FOR DISCUSSION: QUOTES FROM BLACKBIRD

“Not acknowledging suicide casts shame on the people who die that way . . . Silence won’t erase the suicide.”
How does transparency about suicide help suicide survivors and their communities?

“In grief, memories are oxygen.”
How does reminiscing help one push forward through grief? Can it be harmful to dwell too deeply on memories?

“If you think you need help, you do.”
In what ways has society told us not to ask for help? How can we demonstrate that there is strength in asking for help?

“You can recognize you have a beautiful life and an unbearably hard life. You can give love freely and struggle receiving love. You can be playful and impish and be depressed. You can love and be loved and lose the will to live.”
What does accepting the power of and look like? How can accepting the power of and alter your outlook?

“I’m not angry at Charlie; I’m angry at his decision . . . But isn’t the decision the ultimate embodiment of the person? Does that mean I’m actually angry with Charlie.”
What are the different versions of anger one experiences after losing a loved one? Are there variations between being angry at the person and being angry at their actions?

“The bookends of Charlie’s short life were 9/11 and the pandemic. Say what you will about Gen Z, but surely those events have had a deep impact on the way they view their place in this big, scary world?”
How have you and your loved ones been affected by 9/11 and the global pandemic? Has your mental health been affected? Does it help to talk about your experiences and responses?

“Even the ordinary will never be the same. Especially the ordinary will never be the same.”
After loss, how do you create a “new” ordinary while still acknowledging and treasuring the old one?

“Time does heal, but healing isn’t the magical outcome of pages flipping on the calendar. Healing comes from experiencing firsts large and small, then experiencing them again and again . . . surviving firsts teaches us we’re capable of growth, and these accomplishments provide the fuel to tackle the next first.”
Are there any “firsts” after loss you’ve gotten through that felt monumental? How can those around you help you get through these “firsts”?

“What-if is a bend backward. What-if must be released to move forward. Focus on what is.”
How does one combat a barrage of what-ifs? Should we allow ourselves to ask these questions sometimes? How do you know when to stop?

“If you don’t tell your story, someone else will.”
Can telling your own story relieve any burdens in your life? How can owning your story liberate you?